(Re)introducing proud preemie mom, Jodi . . .
If you’re reading this, you probably know that November is Prematurity Awareness Month. In celebration of this important time, we honor little warriors everywhere and the families who support them on their journeys.
Today, we’re excited to welcome back Jodi Klaristenfeld, a passionate preemie mom who draws on her own experience to guide and uplift other parents navigating the NICU. Here, in the spirit of gratitude that November brings, Jodi shares eight things she’s thankful for as a mother to a premature baby. . .
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Preemie parenthood – let’s talk about it . . .
When we talk about preemie parenthood, we tend to focus on the struggle. In what ways does a preemie mom lack support? What is the impact of the NICU on their mental health? What financial barriers do they face? I myself have gone on numerous podcasts and live news segments to raise awareness around these issues.
Don’t get me wrong, we need to talk about the bad stuff. We need to have a public discourse so that we can find real, viable solutions. I never want to minimize the challenges of being a preemie mom. Yet at the same time, I can’t stress how important it is to also create space for gratitude and positive reflection.
I get it. No one wants their baby to be born early. Everyone wants a child that is healthy, happy, and full-term. But there is also a kind of magic that comes from having a child in the NICU. There are special, intimate moments you can only experience if you’re a mom spending hours beside your child’s isolette. And that’s worth thinking about.
One of the most powerful tools I had when my daughter spent 77 days in the NICU was perspective. Even though my brain was clouded with guilt, and overwhelmed with catastrophic thinking, I learned to intentionally invite positive thoughts and gratitude. By focusing on my daughter’s small wins, growth, and smiling face, I was able to stay strong for my family. As time went on, I found that navigating my journey as a preemie mom was largely about reframing my mindset.
I’d like to share eight things that I feel the most grateful for as a preemie mom. Whether you’re expecting, have a child in the NICU right now, or are several years out from your hospital journey, I hope this list resonates with you, inspires you, and makes you feel a little less alone.
8 things I’m grateful for as a preemie mom . . .
Lifesaving advances in newborn care
I’m beyond grateful for the many scientific and technological advances that give our most extremely medically fragile babies a fighting chance at life.
When I had my daughter, Jenna, I was diagnosed with preeclampsia and HELLP Syndrome. Simply put, my belly was no longer a safe place for her. Those first weeks weren’t what I had imagined but I came to think of the NICU as a haven.
It was here that her isolette provided a cocoon of safety. It was here that she had access to the donor milk experts widely consider the best and safest option for preemies who don’t yet have a maternal milk supply. The same milk she needed to grow and thrive. It was here, in the NICU, that Jenna would receive the very best in 24/7 round-the-clock care.
The way in which the NICU opened my eyes
The NICU opened my eyes in a way that being a parent to a full-term kid wouldn’t. All the milestones I would have taken for granted: breathing without a respirator, maintaining their own body temperature, developing suck and swallow reflexes, felt monumental.
I gained a deep appreciation for human life and a child’s growth and development. Babies are fascinating, resilient, and so, so strong. This is part of the reason I hold the title of “preemie mom” so proudly.
Discovering the true meaning of strength
I thought I knew what strength was before becoming a preemie mom, but I was wrong. Having my world flipped upside down by the NICU was a true test of my resiliency, determination, and perseverance.
More than that, my daughter taught me what true tenacity looked like. She had to fight harder than anyone–myself, the doctors, my husband, etc. It was ultimately up to her. I know this strength will serve her later in life, and I can’t wait to watch her grow up and take the world by storm.
Dedicated doctors, nurses, and team members
I continually refer to all the doctors, nurses, specialists, therapists, and teachers as “angels” because that’s what they are to me. Jenna’s success simply wouldn’t have been possible without them. Their love, attention, and care have played a critical role in her development. I am forever indebted to them!
The reminder about what is most important
Few things are more important in this world than being present with the people we love. Many of us are reminded of this fact in times of crisis.
There is something about the NICU that makes all of the small worries, inconveniences, and problems melt away. All that matters is showing up for your family and loving them with all your heart.
The lessons I’ve learned in patience
As a society, we are so fixated on controlling everything. That’s why having a child in the NICU is so difficult.
Letting go of that control taught me to have more patience in every aspect of life. I’ve learned that instant gratification isn’t always the right answer. Sometimes you have to surrender to a higher power, the universe, or the forces that be.
The good news is that patience, teamwork, and “trusting the process” often gets us farther than we could ever venture to go on our own.
The way I was able to bond with my daughter
I got to bond with my daughter in ways that most people don’t ever get to experience. She sat skin-to-skin on my chest for hours each day. And you know what? I think I got more out of our cuddle sessions than she did.
Each time I held her, it felt so right. As a bonus, my husband got to bond with her too. Men don’t always get this opportunity, but the NICU provided a space for him to experience this special time with her too.
How this journey taught me to celebrate everything
My preemie mom motto is to “celebrate every, everything.” No matter how big, small, or seemingly insignificant, each milestone is worth shouting from the mountaintops.
