At 33 weeks, Kaleigh’s pregnancy took an unexpected turn when her son, Declan, was diagnosed with intrauterine growth restriction (IUGR). This diagnosis marked the beginning of an exhausting and emotional journey – one no parent is ever truly prepared for.
Declan arrived early and spent several weeks in the NICU, where every ounce of milk and weight gain mattered. Thankfully, looks can be deceiving, and despite his IUGR diagnosis, little Declan proved himself a great warrior. Now a healthy, happy 21-month-old, he’s even helping his mom, milk donor Kaleigh, gear up for her fourteenth Falmouth Road Race – this time on behalf of the milk bank . . .
Can you tell us a little about Declan’s birth and subsequent NICU stay?
At 33 weeks, Declan was diagnosed with severe intrauterine growth restriction (IUGR), measuring below the 2nd percentile! We were closely monitored by a team of specialists in Boston until he was born at 35 weeks. Weighing just 3 lb 4 oz, Declan was tiny but determined.
He spent a week in the NICU in Boston until he was stable enough to be transferred to a facility closer to home in Plymouth. There, he spent three more weeks getting stronger and learning how to feed on his own.
What was it like to navigate those early days in the NICU?
It was extremely hard. Surprisingly, however, some of my favorite memories come from that time.
Early on, we were told we would likely be in the NICU until Declan’s due date, which was incredibly overwhelming. But we very quickly learned all the medical terminology and became comfortable with Declan’s care schedule. The nurses in both Boston and Plymouth did an amazing job teaching us how to care for a preemie who was not only in an isolette but covered in wires.
Almost immediately, I was instructed to pump 12 times a day to establish my supply. We understood how important it was to provide the best possible nourishment for our little guy. With his IUGR diagnosis, he needed every advantage he could get. And while it was physically exhausting on top of everything else, I was determined to provide that for him.
It’s such an emotional rollercoaster – especially at a time when you’re already feeling so much . . .
The hardest part was being separated from Declan and having to leave his room each day. I would bring one of his swaddle blankets home each night, and that really helped me get through. Sleeping with a blanket that had his sweet baby smell made me feel close to him. It also helped me during those middle-of-the-night pumping sessions when I just wished he was home with me. Pumping milk and knowing I was doing everything I could for him gave me such purpose. I’m grateful for that.
The nurses in Boston and Plymouth were so helpful in this regard, too. Every day they provided so much encouragement, love, and support – not just for Declan but for my husband and me. They took pictures and kept us updated anytime Declan gained an ounce or hit a new milestone. Their support kept us focused and allowed us to enjoy our days with him.
Is there anything you’d want other parents to know who might be in that same place?
You are stronger and braver than you feel.
Many of our milk donors are former recipients. Declan didn’t receive donor milk, but you generously made the decision to donate . . .
While in the NICU, I was fortunate enough to provide the nutrients Declan needed, but I saw other moms struggling to produce enough milk for their little ones. I was overwhelmed with emotion – I felt sad for them and guilty for being able to do what I knew they were trying so hard to do.
Not too long after, a mom I knew shared a post about deciding to donate her milk. I began following Mother’s Milk Bank Northeast on Instagram and knew I wanted to do more to help other mothers and fragile babies. I continued to pump with the goal of donating in honor of Declan’s first birthday. It was donating that made me feel empowered and in control after our rocky start.
If you could send a message to a family who received your milk, what would you tell them?
That it was given with love, strength, and so much admiration for their unique journeys!
You’re continuing to help honor and uplift families by running the Falmouth Road Race on our behalf . . .
Yes! I’ve been a runner since high school and really enjoy long distances. I ran the Boston Marathon when I was 12 weeks pregnant with Declan and love that I’m still running with my favorite person today. He comes along on stroller runs with me and gets so excited to see “beep beeps” (cars!).
This will be my fourteenth year running Falmouth. I’ve represented many charities over the years, but raising funds for the milk bank – an organization that means so much to us on a personal level – feels especially rewarding.
Any tips for people preparing to run a race like this?
I’d recommend training on hills! Most people know about the last “big hill,” but the early miles have lots of rolling hills.
I also like to break my race up into “chunks” to make it feel more manageable. For Falmouth, the first third is all shady, rolling hills. The middle section is flat and often super sunny with amazing views of the Vineyard Sound. Then, there’s the last chunk, where you’ll take on that infamous “big hill.” But don’t worry, you’ll have plenty of crowd support; the energy is amazing.
Oh, and find something that brings you joy during your runs. I generally love listening to podcasts. Ali on the Run is a favorite since hearing others talk about their running journeys and personal experiences keeps me motivated.
Did you know . . .
Did you know that just one ounce of milk can provide multiple feedings for little warriors like Declan? Learn more about becoming a milk donor today. If giving milk isn’t the right fit, you can still make a big impact with a financial gift — click here to help.
